So Much For Always
by TheNamesMrsSchmidt
Summary: Two years. It's been two years since the man he loved took his heart and smashed it into tiny pieces. He thought after not having any contact with the person for two years, the feelings would go away, but they haven't. If anything they've gotten stronger. All he did was think about him. Kendall Knight was constantly overwhelming his brain. Everything about him was perfect.
1. Chapter 1

Two years. It's been two years since the man he loved took his heart and smashed it into tiny pieces. He thought after not having any contact with the person for two years, the feelings would go away, but they haven't. If anything they've gotten stronger. All he did was think about him.

Kendall Knight was constantly overwhelming his brain. Everything about him was perfect. From his dirty blonde locks, to his piercing green eyes, to his big… heart, everything. He knew no matter how hard he tried, no matter what he did, nothingcould replace Kendall Knight. _Nothing. _He walked along the beach behind his house looking out into the ocean thinking of the first time he ever saw the blonde-haired beauty.

_It was third grade in Mrs. Smith's class, and she had set up tables with large name tags indicating where each kid sat. _

_"Come on, Logan, you don't want to be late for your first day of second grade do you?" Mrs. Mitchell asked. _

_Logan just responded with a groan. He walked into the classroom with his batman backpack and matching lunch box with nerves wracking his body. He tugged on his mother's dress pants and said, _

_"Momma, what if no one likes me? No one knows me here." _

_His bottom lip began to quiver slightly. Joanna bent down to her son's level. _

_"Honey, you are a fantastic little boy, and just I know you will make so many friends after today. So just have fun, okay?" _

_Logan nodded his head as his mother kissed his forehead and left the school to go to her job. _

_More kids started coming into the class, and Logan's nerves just kept getting worse. He quickly went to find his chair and put his backpack on the back of it. He looked at the other three names tags on the table, "James, Carlos, and Kendall," he read silently. As Logan heard the bell ring, everyone took a seat. Logan now was able to put faces to names on the table. James Diamond, hazel eyes, brown hair, and slightly tanned skin. Carlos Garcia, dark brown eyes, black hair, tanned skin, and for some reason he was wearing a helmet. Then he looked to his right to see a boy who seemed to be doing the exact same thing Logan was doing. He had dark blonde hair, soft green eyes, and dimples, just like Logan. Kendall Knight is what the name tag read. Kendall smiled at Logan, to which Logan just smiled back. _

_Mrs. Smith stood in front of the class and said in a cheerful voice, "Okay class, why don't we all go sit on the reading carpet? Then we can tell names, share about summers, and anything else to let the class get to know you a little bit better." _

_She smiled as all the second graders went to sit in a circle on the rug. Kendall sat down and patted a spot next to him as he looked at Logan. Logan smiled and sat next to him, feeling happy inside that he might've already made a friend. _

_"Okay, now that we are all in a circle why don't you say your name, your favorite thing you did this summer, and something you love," Mrs. Smith said. _

_Then she did something Logan was desperately hoping she wouldn't. _

_She pointed to Logan saying, "How about you start, sweetie." _

_Logan gulped and stood up. He adjusted the glasses that were a bit to large for is second grade head. _

_"U-uh, Hi, m-my name is Logan Mitchell," he started. There were some snickers going around in the circle and Logan could hear the word "nerd" or "geek". He looked down at his argyle sweater vest his mother had bought him last week. He looked down at his socks that came three inches above where his shoes stopped. 'I am a nerd' he thought. _

_Logan sighed, about to sit down and not finish when someone spoke up. _

_"What did you do this summer, Logan?" The voice had come from Kendall who nodded his head encouraging Logan to go on. _

_Logan smiled before saying, "I went to a really cool science museum with my dad this summer." More snickers, but this time Kendall glared at the ones who did it. Logan continued, "I love…hockey." _

_Right after he said that, a voice next to him said, "Me too!" _

_Logan looked to Kendall and smiled before sitting down. Kendall stood up for his turn. _

_"Hey everybody, my name is Kendall Knight, my favorite thing I did this summer was go to a Minnesota Wild game with my dad, and I love hockey too!" _

_Logan was amazed at how Kendall could just talk like that in front of everyone. Logan sat through and listened to all 23 kids in his second grade class, and before he knew it, it was already lunch time. _

_Logan grabbed his lunch like everyone else and walked down to the lunch room. Logan didn't see Kendall right away, so he decided he would just go sit at a table by himself. Just as he was pulling a sandwich out of his batman lunchbox, a wadded up sheet of notebook paper hit him in the head. He looked in the direction of where the ball came from to see kids laughing at him. He opened up the piece of paper to see a sloppily written word on it. "Dork". Logan just sunk in his seat. He felt so low. 'Mom, you couldn't have been more wrong,' he thought. Thankfully, before anything else happened, Kendall came over to sit by Logan. Right when he sat down, Kendall noticed the piece of paper, what was written and how low Logan's demeanor was. Kendall turned around, grabbed the piece of paper, and marched over to those cruel second graders. _

_"Hey Kendall!" one of the kids said. _

_"Why are you sitting with dorky over there? Come sit with us!" another one said. _

_He slammed the piece of paper down on the table, causing everyone in the lunch room to look. "You guys are dumb! Logan is a nice! So what if he is smart and wears glasses? You guys better stop picking on him, or else!" _

_He walked back to Logan. "Don't let them push you around okay? You are better than them, and you have me. I'll always be your friend."_

'Lie,' Logan thought, 'What a bold faced lie to my face.' Kendall wasn't here to be Logan's friend. He hadn't been there for four years! Logan had to live without his best friend for four years. No one understood Logan like Kendall did, no one was there for Logan like Kendall was, no one could do _anything_ like Kendall could. Logan had tried so hard to make Kendall leave his thoughts.

He did everything he could think of to leave the thought of Kendall Knight behind. But nothing could ever make him forget the love he felt of his best friend, kendall Knight So much for always.


	2. Chapter 2

Kendall was the first thing he thought about when he woke up, and the last thing he thought about before he went to sleep. His dreams were filled with those sweet green eyes that made Logan melt every time he looked into them. Logan and Kendall had always been there for each other, through thick and thin, Logan knew Kendall was there for him, just like he was always there for Kendall.

They did everything together. Kendall had even gotten Logan to join Pee Wee Hockey with him. Both of them relied on each other, mostly Logan relying on Kendall, but in one stormy night in 7th grade, it was Logan who helped Kendall through the most difficult thing in his life.

_Logan sat on the bench in the church twiddling his thumbs next to his friends James and Carlos. They had all met through their hockey team, and had clicked instantly. However, James and Carlos knew that Logan's and Kendall's relationship was different than what the two of them could be with Logan and Kendall. _

_Logan looked over to the other two boys giving them a look as if silently saying, "We need to be there for him no matter what." _

_The two boys nodded before they all looked up to a tear-stained face and green eyes filled with sadness._

_Kendall took a seat next to Logan bowing his head, trying not to let the tears flow from his eyes but failing miserably. Logan patted Kendall on the back and rubbed it consolingly. Kendall didn't look up as the Priest began. _

_"Kyle Sean Knight was a beloved husband, father, and friend. He was always active in the community with his wife, Jennifer, and his support for everyone was astonishing. He didn't have a bad bone in his body. He was a very proud father of his two children, Kendall and Katie, and I know he is looking down and smiling at you two right now." _

_Logan looked at Kendall as he scoffed slightly to what was said. _

_He couldn't hear the rest of the speech said by the priest because he was too focus on his best friend. Kendall, his strong, proud, loving, and perfect best friend, who was crumbling down to pieces before Logan's very eyes. It broke Logan's heart over and over again every time a tear dropped from Kendall's sorrow-filled eyes. _

_Logan nudged Kendall and whispered, "Hey buddy, I know it's going to be hard, but it's your turn to talk." _

_Kendall just shook his head 'no' frivolously. _

_He asked, "Loges, c-could y-you read it f-for me? P-please, Loges?" _

_Logan nodded with a sigh. He got up with Kendall, putting his arm around the taller boys shoulder as he walked up to the front of the church. __Logan took a deep breath. He hated crowds, but this was for Kendall, and he would do anything for Kendall._

_"Dad," he started. "You are the best dad I could've asked for. You always supported everything I wanted, and didn't make me do anything I didn't want. You pushed me to do the best person I could possibly be, and didn't accept anything less. You made me the person I am today dad, well you and mom, everything you did for me…I always appreciated it because I knew everything you did was out of love for me. You were the best dad to Katie too. You know the night before we brought Katie home from the hospital, and I was at Grammy's, and I cried the whole night thinking that you would ignore me and only want to spend time with Katie. Grammy told me that was ridiculous, and to really think if you were the kind of dad to do that. You weren't. I never felt ignored one day of my life." Logan looked over to a sobbing Kendall standing next to him. _

_Logan gave Kendall a small smile before continuing._

"_Dad, I'm going to miss everything we did, everything we didn't do, and everything we were going to do. There was so much I wanted to share with you. The first day of high school, the day I get my license, the first day of college, and when I get signed to play on the Minnesota Wild." Logan smiled knowing Kendall and knowing Kendall would 100% get signed to play with the Minnesota Wild. _

_Logan started again, "When we got the call that you had been in an accident, my heart dropped. Everything went black. I knew right then, my life would be duller forever, I wouldn't have the best life because you weren't going to be in it. But then, I realized, that's not what you taught me. You always said, 'If something knocks you down, you always get back up.' I knew it would be hard, but I had to be strong for Katie and Mom. Dad, you were my role model, my hero, and my dad. I love you and I always will." _

_Logan was in tears by the end as well. He gave Kendall a hug before Kendall and Katie came up to the front to squeeze them both into a hug. _

_That was the moment Kendall knew Logan and him would always be friends. _

'Always,' Logan thought, 'So much for that'.

_That night Kendall didn't want to be at home. He didn't want to be around his mom and sister when he bawled his eyes out, so he went over to Logan's. Kendall was looking up at the ceiling, as he lay on Logan's bed. Logan tossed a T-shirt and some PJ pants to Kendall. _

_"Get out of that suit, put on the PJs, then we can do whatever," he said to Kendall, taking his own dress shirt off. Kendall went into the bathroom connected to Logan's room. When Kendall was done changing, he left the bathroom and saw Logan doing the same thing he was just doing minutes before. He went over to lay next to Logan. _

_They both lay there in a comfortable silence before Kendall spoke up, "I don't really want to do anything but sleep, is that okay?" Logan just nodded for a response before he turned out the light. _

_They both got under the covers. Sleeping in the same bed wasn't a big deal for them. They've done it since second grade. They both stay on their sides every time, but tonight, tonight was different. Kendall was feeling emptiness in his heart and Logan knew it. Logan grabbed Kendall's hand under the covers, and to Logan's surprise Kendall didn't pull it away, or say "What the Hell?" He simply accepted the gesture. _

_Logan suddenly felt Kendall's body move towards him, then a blonde head was on his chest. Logan smiled at the action. Kendall may have only been doing it for comfort, but to Logan it was everything. He was in an awkward phase in his life, beginning puberty, which meant more muscles, but also more feelings, but those feelings weren't for the hot blonde on the cheer leading squad. No, those feelings were for Kendall._

_Logan ran his fingers through Kendall's hair loving every minute of this, but hoping it wouldn't freak out Kendall. _

_Luckily, Kendall only sighed and whispered, "Thank you, Logie, thank you for everything." _

_He wrapped his arms around Logan as he drifted to sleep. "I'll always be here for you," he said, and thinking Kendall was fast asleep, he leaned down to kiss Kendall's head._

That was the day Logan knew he was falling in love with his best friend. Now, Logan knows no one will ever measure up to the beautiful blonde. Always was shorter than anyone could have ever guessed.


End file.
